OK, so I actually found a place that has "Health Guards" (Protectos, ass gaskets) in Wisconsin. However, I'm pretty sure they are new to the region. There was a was a sign above the toilet that read.
"Please keep our bathroom clean, use seat protectors"
Now, this might not seem odd at first, but read it again. Why would using seat protector keep the bathroom "clean". Isn't it the other way around? Shouldn't I be keeping myself clean? What exactly do they think we are going to do with these "seat protectors?"
The mystery deepens.